A letter from my 15-year old self and back.
Dear Ally,
You know everything I am thinking of right now. You've known too many things for so long.
Do you still remember the most important ones?
You know everything I am thinking of right now. You've known too many things for so long.
Do you still remember the most important ones?
Kind of.
Do you still reminisce nostalgic moments before you sleep? Do you still wish you could find out who and what killed President JFK? Is Seinfeld still the best show on the planet? Is Desperado by The Eagles still your favorite song?
Do you still reminisce nostalgic moments before you sleep? Do you still wish you could find out who and what killed President JFK? Is Seinfeld still the best show on the planet? Is Desperado by The Eagles still your favorite song?
I kind of gave up on the dream of finding out who killed JFK (because I got too damn busy), but I still love Seinfeld. By the way, “The World Is Ugly” by MCR became an actual song. So Desperado is probably second.
What about comic books? I hope you're still in love with them, and still in love with writing about them--they're fun and lovely and amazing, you'll surely adore them for the rest of your life.
What about comic books? I hope you're still in love with them, and still in love with writing about them--they're fun and lovely and amazing, you'll surely adore them for the rest of your life.
I definitely still am. And I definitely will love them for the rest of my life.
Is your collection of action figures still intact? And how is the condition of your room--any new pieces that have been in addition?
Is your collection of action figures still intact? And how is the condition of your room--any new pieces that have been in addition?
At around 2016 I became obsessed with matryoshka dolls. You’ll have a lot of those soon.
Is James Jean still your favorite artist/the greatest man in the universe? Did he come back to Manila, and did you get to meet him a second time? If he did, did he hug you again? Did you get something signed by him? Did you chicken out again?
Is James Jean still your favorite artist/the greatest man in the universe? Did he come back to Manila, and did you get to meet him a second time? If he did, did he hug you again? Did you get something signed by him? Did you chicken out again?
Yes he still is my favorite artist! And yes, he came to Manila and we got a million stuff signed by him. And yes, we tackled him on the street. But, the greatest man in the universe is your dad.
How are your drawings and your portfolio coming 'round?
How are your drawings and your portfolio coming 'round?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA you’ll write a book in 2016.
Do you still write on your blog?
Do you still write on your blog?
I just got back to it today! After two years, actually.
How are you, now that Annetta's been in Singapore and is now living there permanently? Do you feel lonely at times?
How are you, now that Annetta's been in Singapore and is now living there permanently? Do you feel lonely at times?
It really took a while to adjust. But in college, I met the most amazing friends I could ever ask for. So don’t worry--they’re incredible people, and they exist.
Do you still have a fear of commuting alone?
Do you still have a fear of commuting alone?
Actually, you’ll come to love it. The problem is, traffic will only get worse.
Has anyone you loved gone to Heaven yet?
Has anyone you loved gone to Heaven yet?
Yes, Ally. It’s still sad, but you’ll also watch this amazing movie called The Crow, and in The Crow they say this beautiful line that goes, “It can’t rain all the time.” And it will be a line you’ll remember forever.
Does the idea of life still worry you?
Does the idea of life still worry you?
Sometimes.
And have you learned how to like yourself at least a little more?
And have you learned how to like yourself at least a little more?
Honestly, yes. It took a lot of therapy, a near-crisis experience, several panic attacks, three workshops and serotonin syndrome to get here, but yes. I do.
Whatever you've been through this year, you'll make it, I'm sure. Don't lose hope, don't lose faith, and don't try and run away from life when it despises you the most.
Take care of yourself.
I love you, 15-year-old Ally.
Whatever you've been through this year, you'll make it, I'm sure. Don't lose hope, don't lose faith, and don't try and run away from life when it despises you the most.
Take care of yourself.
I love you, 15-year-old Ally.