The world, as it seems.

We didn't have much homework today. Almost as if we had no homework today at all, and we don't have any, so it seems, so I guess that's good.

I feel that tonight, I deserve a peaceful kind of sleep. It gets colder and colder every night of everyday, so it seems, and so I guess that's good too.

Everyday, I find myself wishing I could just be at home with my brother and parents. Even if I could be contained in the same room for the rest of my life, just as long as the world doesn't see me or care about whatever it is I do. 

 

It's not supposed to be any of their business, anyway, as selfish as it seems.

And so I guess that would be good too.

During lunch today, instead of sitting with Lorra and Shine, I sat with my busmate, Frances, and her friend Angelica. There was just something different about being around them. It's as if I belonged with them. Everything we could talk about just clicked, sparked, and it felt really good to leave all third year insecurities behind and befriend these two first year girls.

We just went around the schoolyard, going through the books being sold at the Book Fair, talking about weird things that happen during class, even watching them trick one of their friends and hide his food was golden. All pure, innocent, and good fun.

Something third year life lacks.

I guess you could say third year life lacks luster, so it seems.

And really, that's just not good at all.

You want to know something?

There's this place at Seed, completely isolated from cafeteria noise and such. It's contained by trees, grass, and gates, but it's so perfect and so quiet, and the sky looks so broad and so still and nobody recognizes this place at all.

They call it a gazebo, really. To me, that place is like the intersection between the world and space. It would be the perfect place to stay when no one's around. It's a locked corner in this universe and it's everything I've been dreaming of.

I wish to go there one day. Stay there, and dream all by myself. Maybe I can bring my Bible there and have quiet time. Or I could draw there.

There, the world doesn't see me. And there, I can watch everything all by myself.

It's one of the few places of proof that God controls every graceful thing in the universe.

This I know is good.